A lot of the fear around birth and birth trauma today comes from fear of the unknown, lack of knowledge, feeling of being out of control, feeling things were ‘done to you’ and questioning consent, which in turn leads to us feeling inadequate, failing, traumatised, etc.  These are very valid feelings and it is recognised more and more – however instead of questioning yourself and considering you have failed perhaps start with an unanswered question and JUST ASK, even if it is after the event and you need clarity and understanding therein allowing you to have a better comprehension of your experience and being better prepared for what is necessary for your future,  should you need counselling, ongoing care, preparation for future births.